Topical Dead Baby Jokes

Sorry pal, you were born in Gaza... image courtesy of iloveclipart.com

What do you call a dead baby in the back seat and two grown men in front?
Technically a carpool

What do you call 6.22 dead babies for every 1000 live ones?
The United States’ infant mortality rate

What’s bald and tiny and red all over?
A tragic victim of what was clearly a natural disaster.

What do you call fifty-odd infants, many of which either have terrible diseases or are addicted to crack, chopped up into tiny pieces so no one remembers what they were originally, sewn back together and adorned with a nice red ribbon and AAA backing from Standard and Poors?
A Dead Baby CDO.

What do you call a baby’s corpse in Gaza, dead from malnourishment?
Not our problem. Oh yeah, and Israel has a right to defend itself.

What’s worse than five dead babies?
Legalizing pot. No, for real, it could lead to the end of civil society.

What’s the difference between a dead baby and an abortion?
First of all, a fetus isn’t sentient, does not feel pain and is unaware of its surroundings. Secondly, it does not become a living thing until it is able to digest and perform other necessary functions of life on it’s own, i.e. after it is born. Most abortions occur before the fetus has even developed most of the features that we, as human beings, would think of as making it human. Also, there are far fewer ways to abort a fetus than to kill a baby.